Scorned

For litt siden la Julie ut et lite innlegg på et par forum for å la flere få muligheten til å høre at det er mulig å faktisk skrive til noen i fengsel. Noen av dere har kanskje kommet over bloggen gjennom nettopp dette, men en kan vel trygt si at det var blandede tilbakemeldinger som kom. I og med at L er så interessert i alt som foregår rundt bloggen, fortalte jeg ham om dette, og det ventet et blogginnlegg i posten nå for et par dager siden. Han har noen gode poeng her, så ville bare dele dette med dere.

Jeg velger å kalle noen av tilbakemeldingene fordommer.

Scorned

Hey Y’all, I wanted to talk to you about something that I should have in the beginning, something that you will more than likely have to go through at some point if you are writing an inmate. The fact that you will have to deal with people who will, well to put it plainly, people who will be mean to you because you make a difference in someone’s life. It is difficult to reconcile this ridicule you will face with the compassionate face society seeks to engender, but it is true. You will be looked down upon for your kindness.

As an example, the two young women who run this site were recently attacked by some young men who made a mockery of what they are trying to do, twisted the compassion that they are attempting to bring into the lives of those who most of you would not even think of. I wonder at the character of the "men" who would do something like this. The facts are though that if you choose to write someone in prison, you more than likely will be derided at one time or another. My opinion is that these men probably thought the young women who run this site are attractive and could not stand the idea that they would be attracted to a criminal. You know, I can understand that, but they did themselves no favors in how they approached their subject. I don’t think they impressed anyone with their hate.

However, there were some interesting points in their words. Even though it pains me to say this, anyone who seeks to befriend anyone in prison, whether man or woman, I would advise you not to engage in a romantic relationship with that person. 90 % of these relationships do not end well. Not that they end up with something bad happening, they just end. There are exceptions and sometimes they do work, but most of the time they do not. Another thing I wanted to address was the idea that an inmate is someone to be afraid of. The answer to that question is difficult because yes you should be aware of what the person you want to write has done and is capable of. Google can usually tell you much of that. But you know the fact remains that you can write to someone and then decide that it would not work, Be honest and up front. I will tell you true that the odds of any physical harm coming to you from an inmate that you will never actually see is …uhm… nil. The odds of an inmate coming to Norway, an ex-con whom Norway would more than likely not allow in country is pretty much nil. And then there is the fact that you are changing a life; if that is something that you have done, then how could that ever enter your mind?

To become someone’s friend and show someone a better way, to mentor them and help them become better people is such a noble thing. And in doing so, you also make our world a better place. This is true in all parts of our world and does not just apply to the prisoner. As a prisoner though, it takes your effort to reach out, because we cannot do it on our own way and most of the time we would not even think to do so. What this means is that you are needed.

You know, I will more than likely not ever get out of prison, but I am blessed. I find joy in every day; I have hope and faith, and I have a reason to wake up each day. Whether it is to write this blog or write a letter to my good friend or to find some way to better the world that I live in. In all of these things I am blessed. If you would have known me when I first got locked up, you would never ever think I could have become the man I am today; I was not a nice person. My rage is gone now, and I could not have done it on my own. Remember that when it seems that it is not worth the scorn you will face; the change that takes place in the heart of a man is something that he cannot do alone.

Peace